#GuestDayTuesday – Featuring Author #D. G. Kaye

/ Marcia

Today, it is my great pleasure to have author D. G. Kaye (known to many of us as Debby Gies) as my special guest. I know you are all going to enjoy Debby’s very interesting post, so I will let her have the floor without further ado. Debby, take it away! 😀

Thanks so much for having me over today Marcia to share my recent release of my new book, Fifteen First Times – Beginnings: A Collection of Indelible Firsts. After two years of no real production, I managed to get this book out just before Christmas 2022.

Thoughts

Do you ever think back on past events which have left an indelible impression on you or your life, or find that the incidents you’ve endured through life have helped shape the person you’ve become? Are your formed perceptions and values developed from experience, and have they consequently become incorporated into your daily life? Our experiences are steppingstones for much of what feed our character. We live, we experience, we learn, we become, and we overcome.

 Nobody sent me the memo on life, and most of the time, I had zero confidence to broach the subject of my conflictions and situations with anyone. All these events I experienced and share in my stories happened with little to no guidance or knowledge, making much of my young life experiences processes of trial and error. I was like the proverbial child who grew up in the wild, except I had parents and a comfortable home.

In these fifteen short stories, I’m fessing up to some firsts in my life, some of which turned out to serve as monumental lessons. These weren’t life-altering moments, but rather, moments of teaching to move my life forward, leaving me with scars and awakening moments, confirming my curiosities, and leading me in new directions of growth.

I finished writing this book just over three years ago. When it was ready for edits, I left it to marinate since it was late 2019 and I was getting ready for my winter escape with my husband in early 2020. By the time we returned in mid-March, Covid lockdowns began and so did my husband’s deterioration of his health. The book was the furthest from my mind, as I had no head for edits and publishing. The year got worse as it progressed, and I lost my husband early spring of 2021. Needless to say, I was in no state of mind for publishing. I pushed myself to get back to it summer 2022, along with many other projects I’d left on hold. And I kept my promise to myself that I’d publish this book before 2022 came to an end. Mission accomplished.

These short stories are a reminiscing back to some of the firsts in my life. They are moments that left an imprint and propelled me forward through life. Nothing that happens to us is insignificant – everything that happens is for a reason or for teaching us something to take forward with us.

Blurb

This book is a collection of stories about some of Kaye’s first-time experiences with life’s most natural events. Told through the intimate conversational writing we’ve come to know from this author, poignant personal steppingstones to learning moments are revealed. She encompasses the heart of each matter with sincerity and sprinkled inflections of humor.

From first kiss to first car to walking in the desert with four-inch heels, Kaye’s short coming-of-age stories take us through her awakenings and important moments of growth, often without warning.  Some good and some not, life lessons are learned through trial and error, winging it, and navigating by the seat of her pants.

Editorial

D.G. Kaye writes with heartfelt regard and unabashed honesty. The life experiences she shares in Fifteen First Times evoke tears as well as laughter. Kaye’s candor and compassion will no doubt appeal to and help many seeking to grow and come into their own. I highly recommend this book and all others by this forthright author. The reader will be left with an ardent desire for more. ~ Author, Tina Frisco

Excerpt

First Blood

May circa 1971, one month before my twelfth birthday, I dashed to my junior high school girls’ bathroom. It was my first year, grade seven. I felt somewhat under the weather, and a cramping sensation made me think I’d wet my pants. With thighs squeezed tight, I scurried to the washroom to investigate what was going on down under. I pulled down my tight Wrangler jeans and plopped myself onto the toilet. And then I saw it. A small crimson pool had saturated my once-white underwear, and my thighs were stained red. Holy shit! I cried out. “What the hell is wrong with me?”

My mind raced as I tried to assess what on earth was happening to me. I went through a checklist of plausible reasons for the mini bloodbath between my legs but couldn’t think of what I might have done to cause it. I knew I hadn’t banged into anything, and I wasn’t in dire pain. All I felt was a slight stretching of my innards. And no, I’d never even heard the word menstruation. What I feared most was, would the hemorrhaging ever stop? One thing I knew for certain—I wasn’t about to tell a soul.

I cleaned up as best I could with what I had to work with, padded my underpants with approximately four inches thick of scruffy brown paper towels from the school bathroom dispensing machine and stole a bunch more to stash in my purse because I didn’t know if that was the end of the affair or if there was more to come. If I’d had any education about what the horrifying event meant, I might have inserted a nickel into the sanitary pad dispenser—if I’d even known what they were for.

A Few Reviews

My review for the book December 21st 2022 by Sally Cronin

The author has a natural conversational style of writing that draws you in as if she is talking to you personally. Her memories prompt the reader’s own experiences at similar ages, and raises a smile or two at the similarities between girls of a certain age, however many thousands of miles they live apart.

This is particularly true in this collection of stories as Kaye shares episodes from her childhood such as playing in her mother’s stiletto shoes which would fuel a lifetime’s love of footwear, a first kiss, and taking that first puff of a parent’s discarded cigarette.

With the smiles comes the tears, as we identify the moments of loneliness and isolation as a girl becomes a woman without the support needed from a mother, a dysfunctional family life, and the loss of a much loved friend who shared the formative years between teens and late twenties.

At the end of the collection is a wonderful tribute to her late husband, who made her laugh every day and was the first and last love of her life.

D.G. Kaye writes with poignancy but also great humour, which makes these first times all the more delightful and memorable. The experiences are not just relevant to girls growing up, as many are relateable to boys and young men coping with the cultural and social expectations of the day, and finding their way in life and relationships. Take a walk down the memory lane of your own life in very good company. Highly recommended.

My Review: By Judith Barrow

Fifteen First Times is a collection of short but evocative memoirs by D G Kaye. I actually wasn’t sure what to expect when I first started to read. All I knew was that, having read various other books by this author, and having always admired her intimate writing style, I was in for a treat. I wasn’t disappointed.

 Although brought up in a different country with a background that was poles apart from my own, I found myself nodding, reminiscing, and recognising so many of her firsts. Indeed I would go so far as to say, that many women would recognise something of themselves, something of their own experiences, in what these recollections bring to mind, wherever they have lived.

 The poignancy of some of the stories brought tears, others a “laugh out loud” moment. But all are written with integrity and complete openness, something I always anticipate from D G Kaye. It’s like sharing and swopping tales from our youths. We have all had our “firsts” in our lives, and this compilation of memories is a treat that makes the reader sit back and reminisce – very satisfying.

So, I would urge any reader to immerse themselves in this book … to enjoy and reflect on their own “firsts”. That’s what this author’s words brought out in me. Highly recommended.

As I say above, I have read other books by D G Kaye, and never been disappointed. The following are a couple from quite a while ago; around the first time I came across this author. As you will see, I’ve been impressed by her writing for many years. Do check them out…

Author D.  G. Kaye

D.G. Kaye is a Canadian author living in Toronto. She is a nonfiction writer of memoirs about her life experiences, matters of the heart, and women’s issues. Her positive outlook keeps her on track, allowing her to take on life’s challenges with a dose of humor and a mission to overcome adversity.

D.G. began writing when pen and paper became the tools to express her pent-up emotions during her turbulent childhood. She began journaling about her life at a young age and continued writing about the people and events that left imprints and lessons. She writes books to share her stories and inspiration.

D.G. is a big advocate for kindness and for empowering women. Her favorite saying is “For every kindness, there should be kindness in return. Wouldn’t that just make the world right?”

When she’s not writing, D.G. loves to read (self-help books and stories of triumph), cook (concocting new recipes, never to come out the same way twice), shop (only if it’s a great sale), play poker (when she gets the chance), and, most of all, travel.

Visit her website at www.dgkayewriter.com and join her mailing list to keep up with her latest blogs and news about her books and events.

You Can Buy D. G.’s Books Here

Amazon Author’s Page: www.amazon.com/author/dgkaye7

You can reach D. G. on Social Media here

Email: d.g.kaye.writer@gmail.com

Blog: https://dgkayewriter.com/
Twitter: www.twitter.com/@pokercubster
Facebook: www.facebook.com/dgkaye
LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/dgkaye7

 Podcast links: Grief the Real Talk
  Soundcloud
  https://www.youtube.com/debbyDGKayeGies

 

102 thoughts on “#GuestDayTuesday – Featuring Author #D. G. Kaye”

  4. I love seeing Debby and her newest release here! Her post was great, and I love the excerpt she shared. I was lucky enough to get mine at home, and my mom had had the talk with me, so I didn’t have the panic that many girls experience. The reviews posted are fantastic, and knowing what I know of Debby, I have no doubt this book is a phenomenal read. Thanks for sharing, Marcia!

    Yvette M Calleiro 🙂
    http://yvettemcalleiro.blogspot.com

    Liked by 2 people

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  6. Having followed Debby for a long time, I know what an incredibly insightful person she is. I know this book is going to be full of honesty and wisdom. I went over and bought it even before leaving this comment. Looking forward to reading it!

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    • That one jumped out at me, too, Mae! I don’t even own a pair of high heels any more, much less wear them in the desert … oh, wait. We don’t have deserts here. 😉 Well, I don’t wear them in the swamps, either. Or out to dinner. Or anywhere else. 😂 (Comfort is my byword.)

      Thanks so much for stopping by and taking a moment to wish Debby success with her latest! 😀 ❤

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply

  9. “Nothing that happens to us is insignificant.” I love that mindset.

    I’m sorry for your loss and for all the delays, but if everything does happen for a reason, then there’s a reason this book needed to come out now. Best wishes, Debby.

    Marcia, thanks for hosting.

    Liked by 3 people

    Reply

  20. We were in the middle of Storm Noa yesterday and it’s such a relief to wake to a hint of a blue patch in the sky. Loved the Marilyn meme, and here’s to those May flowers! ❤ 😀 ❤

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

  21. Pingback: Guest Day at Marcia Meara’s – The Write Stuff, featuring D.G. Kaye – DGKayewriter.com

  23. I loved this line, Debby, and how it sums up how all our experiences – the good, the bad, and the in-between – shape us into who we become: ” moments of teaching to move my life forward, leaving me with scars and awakening moments, confirming my curiosities, and leading me in new directions of growth.” It’s what makes your book so relatable. Not that we all share your experiences exactly, but that we all travel parallel paths. A wonderful guest post. Thanks to Marcia for hosting you! Hugs to you both.

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply

    • Hi Diana. I am truly humbled by your lovely words and comment. You hit the nail on the head; many who read memoir, including myself, haven’t necessarily shared same experiences of these stories, but can relate with their own situations in some other way. Thanks for pointing that out here. Weekend hugs. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

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  26. A wonderful guest post, Marcia and Debby! There’s so much wisdom in what you said about your experience. Instead of curling up and feeling sorry, you believe everything happens for a reason. With that thought, you moved forward. You’re a great example for many. Your book is on my TBR list.

    Liked by 2 people

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  27. I enjoyed reading this book, but felt appalled at the time that Debby knew nothing of menstruation. My own mother had been on at me about it since the age of about 9, and my stock reply always was that as I didn’t want it, then it wouldn’t happen! Wrong!

    Liked by 2 people

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  28. I enjoy ALL of Debby’s books and look forward to reading this one. And what a great idea – short stories of the “firsts” in Debby’s life. I’m sure we’ll all relate to many of them. “First blood” ohhh, yes, and back in our day when we got our first period it was not discussed in “polite society.” I’m glad we women are now able to be more open to what 50% of the population go through. (And no, my mom didn’t talk to me about it – thank goodness girlfriends did, and a film at school.)

    Liked by 1 person

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  29. Amazing!
    Talk about reminiscing on one’s firsts? This post alone, with the brief glimpses it provides, has me wandering the path.
    Thank you for this fab post about this book, and Debby!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  30. I enjoyed this book very much. It’s lovely to know how and when Debbie began writing it. Debbie’s positive attitude towards life shines through in the book. It’s definitely a must-read. Thank you for this lovely interview.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

    • So glad you enjoyed Debby’s post, Smitha, and that you also enjoyed this book. Thanks so much for taking the time to share that with us, and here’s to a great rest of the week! 😀 ❤

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply

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